Bitchy Woman

So, I've been at this job for about 4 months now. I finally have health insurance...woo hoo!! But my boss has been back from maternity leave for about a month now and I gotta tell you, what the fuck is her problem? It's like she purposefully doesn't tell me stuff and then tries to make me feel bad when I mess something up. Which I wouldn't have messed up if she had just told me about it.

I don't get it, why would she do that? And she sends me the stupidest e-mails, she'll ask a question and it's like, um, if you had actually read the message I sent to you then your question would already be answered and you wouldn't be wasting my fucking time trying to deal with this shit.

Thursday was just a really bad day for me. I mean, fuck, I was crying on the way in to work when I was thinking about all the stuff I had to do. They sent me to a stupid meeting in Chicago, where the only high point was that I made friends with another girl who was also at the meeting, and we were flying the same airline so we hung out at the bar before our flights and that was nice. So I got to work Thursday morning and had 123 e-mails, and no, I'm not overexaggerating here, that's how many I really had. We had a conference call which was going over essentially the exact same thing that I had to do at the meeting so it was a huge waste of time. I had a giant bucket of samples that I had to measure and I've got dragon lady breathing down my neck for all sorts of stupid shit that she should be doing.

So the one lday who I like and is nice at work took me out for some coffee because she came by my next and saw me freaking out. So that was really nice. She thinks that dragon lady dumps all this shit on me because I'm smarter than her, which isn't really any consolation because this job isn't rocket science.

But work wasn't the only reason I was freaking out, it doesn't really make me freak out, just when you add onto it all the shit I have for school. I had a test that I was supposed to take on Wednesday but I had to take Tuesday morning because of the stupid Chicago trip so that sucked. I missed out on a day and a half of studying because of work.

And now I had a midterm in my advanced inorganic chemistry class on Tuesday. So Thursday I was supposed to go to practice because we had an exec board meeting afterward but I have just had to make peace with the fact that if something has to get cut back, it's my rugby time. I have to do really well on this test or I'm going to fail the class. My professor is a pain in the ass and he just doesn't understand why I don't get stuff. But it's like if he explains it a little different, or words something differently then I get it. I've been meeting with him for the last couple of weeks to review stuff so it's getting better, it just takes a lot of time. So I had to ditch practice on Thursday but I've been plowing through making my study cards so it was definitely a good thing that I missed it.

I just really wish I had more time. kc really wanted to have sex on Sunday night and I just passed out because I was so tired. That's pretty much never happened to me before and it sucks because it hasn't been all that frequently lately that she says she wants to have sex. But it's like she is more interested in me now because I have so much going on and I don't really have all that much time for her. I don't get it but at least I just don't really have time to think about it.

So yeah, if anyone has invented a way to make time stop so that I can get all my stuff done (or even have time to eat) please let me know. Otherwise, it seems like almost everything I love is getting pushed to the side so I can get school work done. Maybe I'll get a break for next weekend since my tests will be over and I'll actually get to enjoy rugby and stuff. Today I'm going to watch a game at the stadium, there are 2 games this weekend but I can only watch 1 because I need to keep studying and since our actual game is tomorrow and I won't be able to study then I need to get it done today.

I can't believe I've signed up for another 3 years of this. At least I think next semester will be better since it's a couple of repeat classes. But after that, fuck, it's going to be hard. I know, it's my own fault, I sgned up for this all on my own, and I knew it was going to be hard, I just didn't realize it was going to consume every free moment of my time and some moments that aren't free. I really wish I didn't have to scale back rugby so much because that is my release, but at least we have a game tomorrow. No idea how much I'll actually play since I haven't been to practice and there are 2 new girls who don't get told they're too skinny to prop. Oh well, hopefully I can at least get to play a half.

Fuck this is crazy. At least I don't want to jump off a bridge today. Wish I could have slept longer but I passed out early last night so at least I can get some studying in before the girls get here for the game.