Pet Names

Why do people, especially girls, feel the need to get all cute and cuddly with pet names? I mean, don't get me wrong, I really enjoy the sweet little things that kc calls me, but I suck at returning it. It's all well and good, I mean, I'm practically a fucking thesaurus here, but for some reason I get stuck in a mental rut when it comes to stuff like that.

I can articulate how I am feeling, well, I'm getting better at it, but at least I know the words I want to say. But why, when I want to say something sweet, does it come out as a stammer or stutter instead of what I really want to say? Maybe it's because growing up I never heard anyone in my family say anything sweet or nice to their special someone. Maybe it's because I haven't read enough romance novels or watched enough sickeningly sweet movies (although I doubt that is the case).

I hope that kc doesn't think that it is her though, it's not, it's every person that I have ever been in a relationship with. I just can't do it. I can't start calling someone pookie or darling or sweetheart. I want to, I want to have something special, but whenever it comes out of me it just sounds generic and trite.

Maybe that's my problem, maybe my thesaurus doesn't contain those words. I mean, I've managed to use a whole lot of them right now, but none of them are "sweetheart" words. I don't think that she minds that I primarily just call her sunshine, I like it, I like that it's something that I have neither said to someone or had it been said to me. But should I tell her that I don't like being called names that someone has already called me? I suppose I should since that might give her more of a sense of why I'm not good at those things.

On a good note she said that she got me something special, well, specials, so I have no idea what it is. I did tell her that if she ever wanted to be something more than just dating to get me flowers, so maybe that's it. I really have no idea though, but it is nice to have her get me something. I like to do sweet things for her, like having my mom pick up some chocolates and coffee from home so that she can try something from where I grew up. I like doing sweet things, so what if I can't say them, at least I can do them. Maybe I should do something sweet for her and remind her that for me, actions really do speak louder than words, so even if I fuck up the words, my intentions are good and my heart is in the right place.