Yeah, it's time to move on. If kc wants back into my life then she knows what to do and where to find me. There's too much tension when I'm at her house, but at least s will be gone for 3 weeks. However, kc and h are going on a road trip to see kc's family for 10 days and then probably to visit s for a long weekend. At least peacing myself out of the situation should be easy since she won't even be around.
Let me go back to Wednesday night. I had rugby down in the city and had asked kc earlier in the week if I could just sleep at her house that night since we were leaving for backpacking on Thursday morning. To which she said yes. And then on Wednesday night while I'm getting ready to play she sends me a text that says it would be too uncomfortable for me to sleep there, would I mind just going down in the morning? Uh, well, since I was already packed for the trip and hadn't planned on going home, yes it's a huge pain in my ass. However, at least one of the girls on the team lives close by so I just crashed at her place so I didn't have to drive all over creation.
It actually worked out nicely. sr lives close to kc so I didn't have to drive that far, and I got to hang out and have a drama free evening with some of the girls on the team. If it weren't for them I'd have probably considered jumping off a bridge by now. They keep me sane and don't mind my incessant bitching, well, maybe they do, they just don't tell me.
So then I had to go backpacking for 4 days and 3 nights with kc and ud. And did anything happen? NO! Not that I didn't want it to, maybe she did too, but still...nothing. I did get a backrub one night, but other than that, not much, a little canoodling here and there. I did however get some really good nature pictures and the scenery was beautiful. My legs got torn to shit during the hikes though, but oh well, it just makes me look more hardcore.
So after all of this it's just time to peace out. I don't need this shit. I need someone who wants to be with me. Someone who isn't going to keep me around just in case. I want her to know why she wants to be with me and she's going to have to work for it. I want her to miss me when I'm gone since she did while I was visiting my aunts. Maybe she'll miss me while she's on her road trip. Maybe she'll finally hook up with h. At this point I don't care. It's too hard with everything else going on in my life to add that to my stress list. Once again, I'm trying to avoid drama. If I can live drama-free for just a little while my sanity will certainly recover. I've got a party to go to this weekend in the city with one of the other rugby teams and there are some cuties on that team that I can flirt with. And who knows, maybe someone will actually be interested in me that doesn't want to be with someone else.
No comments:
Post a Comment